Rabbit rabbit rabbit

On the first day of every month, my husband wakes up and whispers “rabbit rabbit rabbit” and then sometimes sends the whole family a text with three rabbit emojis in it. It’s supposed to bring good luck for the month. Out of habit, I now say it too. 

This is one of many minor beliefs I have that run the gamut from pure superstition to slightly scientific. A lot of people believe a lot of weird stuff in conjunction with or instead of their organized religion. I thought I would share a few from my personal toolkit.

That lefties are . . .

Do you know any lefties? We are a proud lot. I am completely bought into the idea that lefties are smarter and more creative, and my evidence is me. And my aunt Shelagh. I do not subscribe to the erroneous assertion that lefties die earlier, but if it’s statistically true, it’s because the world is set up to thwart us. Knives, doors, and cars (in the US) are all dangerous and designed for righties’ success. But we lefties adapt, improvise, overcome. 

Birth order personality traits are real.

Of course, as a firstborn, you’d expect me to believe this. But come on, look at your friend group. How many of your friends are in the same spot in the birth order as you are? We are peas in a pod. My poor younger son is the only person in the family who is not a firstborn. We must be insufferable. 

Astrology but only for a couple of zodiac signs.

In general, I think that astrology is bunk, but there are a couple of signs that, when I read the associated characteristics (or characterizations) and think about the people I know in that sign, I think, “Yup.” Specifically, Scorpio, Gemini, and Aquarius. I’m an Aquarius, and I recently started following @costarastrology on Instagram and damn, the Aquarius stuff resonates. Some examples, for Aquarius:

• PSAs: Your interests are not a personality
• Gets mad at you and: Goes off the grid for a month and acts like nothing happened when they come back
• Existential questions: Do I default to irony because sincerity feels too vulnerable?
• Asking for a favor: Would only ever ask the one person they’ve already revealed their emotions to
• Likes you for your: Brain

I could go on but, as the kids say, it hits different. My evidence for Scorpio is that the people I know who are Scorpios are all a bit prickly and self-possessed. Like their namesake, there’s a slight chance they’ll sting. For those of you who went to college with me, this includes Ella, Diamonds, Jamison, and Derek VD. I needn’t say more but my older son is also a Scorpio and again, it hits. 

Alright, there are also some non-religious belief systems that are very popular in the US, including QAnon and Trumpism. Those are cults. Football is marginally cult-like but maybe I just think that because I am fanatically, religiously against football. Maybe it’s fine as a belief system; I don’t have any critical distance on that one.

There are quite a few cultural “properties” (so named by the capitalist content owners that produce them) that offer a belief system that attracts fans. I consider Dungeons & Dragons, the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and Lord of the Rings to be lower-tier religions compared to the One True Faith that is Star Wars. There’s good and evil. There’s a father (Darth), a son (Luke), and a Holy Ghost (Yoda or the Force). There’s a central tenet: the Force. Putting aside the Mitochlorian bullshit - let’s call that pseudepigrapha - Star Wars offers everything an olde tyme religion offers without the weekly church attendance. Although at this point Disney+ has enough Star Wars “property” to fill years’ worth of worship practice. 

The world is bringing us enough conflict that is ostensibly faith-based that I’d rather not venture into any more real religion at the moment. To counteract the awfulness in the world, I’ve got some recommendations that can best be described as “gentle,” and I mean that in a nice way.

I’m watching: Nate Bargatze (“the nicest man in stand-up”) specials. His SNL opener this week was great, so I watched one of his specials and it was like a warm bath where you also laugh hysterically. 

I’m reading: Fellowship Point by Alice Elliott Dark. The protagonists of this novel about friendship and privilege are two women in their 80s, and they are sweet and complicated, and insightful and funny. The novel is described as a 19th-century novel (think Austen or Henry James) set in the 2000s, and that’s accurate. 

I’m listening: t0 a lot of podcasts lately because I find it easier to run to podcasts than to my usual running playlist (so I can run more slowly). Specifically, check out David Axelrod’s interview with California governor Gavin Newsom, and Hamish McKenzie’s interview with writer George Saunders. Both Gavin and George are more humble and interesting than you would expect, and Saunders is honestly a bodhisattva, although I doubt he’d admit it. 

Give me your favorite fake beliefs and your most gentle recommendations to sustain me through the week. You only need to get me through to next Tuesday, when I am going to see Lauryn Hill and The Fugees (god willing and the creek don’t rise). See you next week!